Rhyming Picture Book of the Week: Mother Earth and Her Children

Every Friday as part of RhyPiBoMo I will be sharing a rhyming picture book that I read and loved that week. Today I am sharing an adaptation of a beautiful spring book by Sibylle Von Olfers, called Mother Earth and Her Children, A Quilted Fairy Tale. This gorgeous book has been translated into rhyming verse by Jack Zipes, and the illustrations are images from a glorious quilt, sewn by artist Sieglinde Schoen Smith.

The verse is simple and has an ease and lightness that suit the intricate details of the quilt. Special thanks and love to my mother, Helen for sending this book to my littlest on the first day of spring! xo

A Lovely Book Review
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Friends of SHE IS STILL MAMA: March 2015 Update

Happy Spring! I am so pleased to update you on the progress of SHE IS STILL MAMA, my not-for-profit children's book about breast cancer. 

I recently returned from a hugely inspiring conference hosted by The Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators. It was a breakthrough weekend for me -- as illustrator particularly. I decided at the last moment to present my portfolio and I'm so glad I did. I had a chance to come out of my shell and introduce my artwork in front of 100 people. I've never been more nervous! Showing my art is such a vulnerable experience. I also had the opportunity to meet and work with Caldecott Honor Award winning illustrator, E. B. Lewis. I learned so much about illustrating picture books. Authors and illustrators alike are equal storytellers: one tells through the word; the other tells through the pictures.

My current approach to illustrating SHE IS STILL MAMA is working with my daughter's watercolor paintings from kindergarten. Using the watercolor as a starting point, I add layers of chalk pastel to create the scene. Here is a peek at the process!

What's next?

The story text is in excellent shape. I received insightful feedback from my critique group, which I am working on incorporating. I'm also moving forward with illustrations, taking what I learned at the SCBWI Conference and kicking everything up a notch! I now have the confidence to make big strides toward a winning picture book.

Will you donate to help me reach my goal?

Every single donation (large & small) directly serves to put SHE IS STILL MAMA into the hands of children and their families who need it.

You really are making a difference. Huge thanks to all of you who have donated!

https://www.crowdrise.com/sheisstillmamaahand-drawnchildrenspicturebook/fundraiser/karenroos1

Want to know more about SHE IS STILL MAMA?

I have decided to self-publish my picture book so that I can give directly to women and men who are living their lives with cancer. From free yoga and art classes, to "Look Good, Feel Better" seminars, workshops for family and consults with nurses, Katz Cancer Center helps real people facing cancer every day. All of their services are free of charge without question, for anyone with cancer, either undergoing treatment or fully recovered.
(http://www.dominicanhospital.org/Medical_Services/Cancer_Care/052801).

SHE IS STILL MAMA is written for the young child (2-6 years old), and provides a unique view into the topic of breast cancer. Very few books approach this subject with young children and yet, there are hundreds of thousands of women diagnosed with breast cancer every year. Since 1999, incidence rates of certain types of breast cancer have increased in younger women (Breast Cancer Facts & Figures, 2009-2010, American Cancer Society). Mothers with breast cancer are in need of targeted support for their young children.

Tattoo Update

On April 6th, I will get my first tattoo. Over the years, I've been intrigued by tattoos, and even open to them. I just never felt connected to a particular image or symbol that I wanted on my body for the rest of my life. 

Now, I find myself in a position where a tattoo is not only a statement, but a reclaiming, a redefining and a healing of my body and my soul. 

A lot of women (but definitely not all) who have had a mastectomy undergo reconstruction. And one of the things that we have to face is the nipple situation. A reconstructed breast doesn't have a nipple. This is added later, either created by a plastic surgeon or a tattoo artist. There are 3-D nipple tattoos that look quite natural and are very popular. 

For me though, there are a few things going on. First, I have one natural breast and nipple and one reconstructed breast (no nipple). So, it would be challenging to create a symmetrical nipple that has the matching skin tone to my real nipple. But to be honest, I never even got that far. Because I don't feel like my reconstructed breast is a breast at all.

In my mind, I definitely do not need a nipple. It's been almost two years since my mastectomy and reconstruction, and I'm just barely getting reconnected to this part of my body. I'm not sure whether this will ever feel like a breast to me. (So, hint: no nipple tattoo for me.)

My tattoo artist is Kristy Quinones at Black and Blue Tattoo in San Francisco. She is working with my inspirations to create the perfect design for me. The artistic elements are particular to my breast cancer experience, and at the same time transcend that journey and speak to my life as a whole. I can hardly wait. 

* Photo Credits: all photos are from p.ink/personal ink Pinterest boards https://www.pinterest.com/personalink/

Boob Ink

I'm planning my mastectomy tattoo. Some of you might be surprised by this. Here's how it happened. 

I met a lovely friend, a fellow breast cancer survivor who came to look at some shoes I was selling. She didn't buy the shoes, but we found we have some common ground in life. Different shoes but similar path. She recently had her mastectomy tattoo done by a P.ink artist in San Francisco. P.ink stands for Personal Ink and provides tattoo ideas and artist info to breast cancer survivors. https://www.pinterest.com/personalink/

My new friend inspired me to start thinking about a new phase of my healing process. I've gone through surgeries, treatments and they've left their marks on my body. I've had reconstruction of my left breast (although it doesn't feel like a breast anymore to me), and I've sat with it the way it is for over a year. I really don't want to do a nipple construction (see above comment about not feeling like this is a breast), and haven't thought much about body art. Until now. 

I am just starting out in my process. First I looked at bunches of mastectomy tattoos and could easily point out what I don't want. No offense at all to other women's choices. It's so personal. But some of the art and placement just doesn't appeal to me. 

Slowly, images starting coming to me. Things that have special meaning to my particular transformation, ignited by a breast cancer diagnosis. I'm collecting inspirations on my Pinterest board here: http://pinterest.com/karencroos/body-art/

Do you have a tattoo? What inspired you to do body art? 

Inspire me.

How can I inspire you? I'm not that woman wearing pink. I'm not that woman walking a 5k. I'm not that woman with a survivor t shirt. I'm not always positive and full of hope. I'm not always grateful for every day I'm alive. I'm not living in fear of death. Sometimes I'm defiant. Sometimes I'm angry. Really pissed. Sometimes I feel like shit. Sometimes I'm not willing to take any more chemicals into my body. Sometimes I'm not willing to do whatever it takes at any cost. At any cost. Sometimes I'm reaching out for help. Help to stay whole. Help to raise money in hopes I can continue alternative treatment. Sometimes I'm just a regular human. How does that inspire you?

Just a Routine Mammogram

This isn't a routine mammogram. It'll never be a routine mammogram again

Actually, I've never had a routine mammogram. The first time I ever had one was after finding a lump in my left breast a year ago. That's when I found out I had stage three breast cancer. 

So you see, I had a reason to be bawling in the waiting room. 

When the technician came out after the mammogram and told me, "We'd like you to have an ultrasound. You can just wait here; we're going to squeeze you in.", my carefully guarded and fragile togetherness fell apart. 

I knew this place, I had been here before. This is the place where they told me I had a tumor and it was most likely cancerous. A biopsy later confirmed that. How could I be in this story again? Did I deserve this? Did I not work hard enough on myself? Did I not do the inner work that was needed? Did I forget something? What lesson did I still need to learn? All of this going through my head and my heart as I sat for 30 minutes waiting for the ultrasound. I felt closer to my fear of death than I've ever been before. 

It took me days to recover from the shock of that morning. My friend told me it was like PTSD. I get that now. I learned that never again will I be visiting the screening lab alone. No matter how many Lion's Breaths. No matter how much meditation, prayers and feelings of calm assuredness. 

It turned out I had two tiny cysts in my right breast. Completely normal and very common, cysts come and go in women's breast tissue. The reality of those results never hit me; I was in such a state of shock that I couldn't feel relief. I just wiped off the gel, put my shirt on, texted my family and drove home to my babies. 

Feathered Friends

It could be chemo brain. Or just one of those things that, once a routine, you no longer recall how it all began. Suffice it to say that about four months ago I started picking up feathers on my walks. 

When I began chemo, it became especially important to me to move my body every day. At first it was walks up and down our little road in the woods. Later, I adopted Quail Hollow Ranch as my refuge and hiking place. I also began a ritual of walking by the ocean on chemo Thursdays. 

Somewhere along the way, in those early days of chemo, I began to pick up feathers in my path while on my daily walks. As the days and walks added up, I realized that I was making an important and amazing connection with our feathered friends. I began to find feathers every time I walked. Sometimes one or two, sometimes a dozen. Once, when faced with a difficult decision (whether or not to continue with chemo), I found an amazing array of feathers all in one spot along my path, guiding me to the right answer. 

As I accumulated a larger and larger bowlful of feathers, I decided that when I was finished with chemo I would do an art project with them. Perhaps I will make myself a pair of wings, that will allow me to take off and soar from this place, taking everything I've learned and incorporating it all into who I am now. I'll share more on that process when the time comes. 

I am looking forward to being done with chemo, but it will be hard to ever stop looking for feathers in my path.